I have this problem called sin.

I just want to talk about how good Jesus is
And how much I am not, because I keep hiding
The shame that I hate so dearly within this
Heart shaped like a flower, ready to bloom,
But I won't let it because of this paralyzing fear
That you'll judge me. And you are judging me
With pursed lips and snide eyes gazing
At this circus act that I call my life.

But I am judging you, too, because for some reason

This brain is fixated on the fact that your sin

Must be so much worse than my own, when

In reality, that is a lie straight from the pits

Of flames blazing, created by the father of lies.

Lies! I keep doing it, and I pray that God

Saves me from my deceptive tongue and

Rotting flesh, joining in His glory up above.

I just want to talk about how deserving He is
And how much I am not, because I keep falling
Away from Him, down a colliding waterfall
That somehow keeps going backwards -
Back to where the river is calm and I try
To tread above the rocky depths, gasping
For air as I slip again. But I am saved by
Someone calling my name and taking my hand.

I have this problem called sin that I hide

Because I am scared of what you would say

If you found out that I am struggling with

Something seemingly small. Well, I struggle

To find a way to tell you what is going on

Inside of this heavy heart and head that feel

As heavy as lead and a pile of fresh-cut bricks.

And it aches and wrenches at me daily.

I just want to talk about how merciful God is,
And how much I need Him, because I keep failing.
I am as broken as a mangled body that fell from
A skyscraper, and I scrape on by, as He picks up
The falling pieces of me, to place it all back to
Make me whole again. I am renewed again.
He puts me together again, even though I keep
Being broken up again and again and again.

Tick-tock, tick-tock. I don't have much time

To give this up, to fight the urge to hold in -

Hold everything back that I need to scream.

I need to get it out to you, because it haunts me,

Like some ghost in a vacated building waiting.

But I just need to say it, and will you listen?

Listen! I am trusting you to hear me out,

Somehow helping me to come to terms with it.

I just want to talk about how forgiving God is,
And how I am nothing, because I keep grazing
Grace, passing on by, realizing that He is enough
For me and for you and for the entire population
Of man, who too scrapes on by, running away
From the arms of the Savior and into the depths
Of the rest of our deprived generation that has
Yet to see the eyes of loving kindness here.